Friday, November 9, 2012

Abort! Abort!

I did not sign up for this.
I hate it when the forecast calls for red lightening bolts

Also, hamster escaped AGAIN. Found her outside in the yard AGAIN. We are slightly concerned that somewhere in our house there is a hole large enough for a hamster to get outside. Now hold on while we go weld her cage shut...

Friday, November 2, 2012


So the hamster disappeared exactly 2 weeks ago and had not been seen since. We were about to give her up for lost when late last night we got a call that the neighbor found her roaming around the back yard. Well, more specifically, the neighbor's cat found the hamster. (That was actually another Google suggestion: use a cat ON A LEASH to see if the cat could find the hamster's whereabouts). No idea how she got out of the house but... Success!

Don't be fooled by her sad little expression--she is a menace!
Now she is back where she belongs. Only she's about twice her regular size... I think she ate ALL of that hamster food she stole a few days ago and/or got impregnated by some street rat. She is soooo fat. Like hamsters-in-the-Kia-commercials fat:

Unrelated: I promised my kids that the llamas would be nice to them if they were nice back. However last week one of the llamas hocked a BIG loogie in this girl's hair for no reason. It was hilarious. But I felt bad for her because it reeeeked.

(And in case you were wondering, I had to look up how to spell "hocked a loogie". I don't think  I've actually ever seen it in print)

Thursday, October 25, 2012


So these are my happenings as of late:
  • For work I secured my kids a weekly gig volunteering at a local llama farm
  • It is cold. It snowed today. Last time I experienced snowy weather was January 21, 2007 when it snowed in Tucson my freshman year of college. Everyone fah-reaked out and said we should close the school calling the event a blizzard (okay so "everyone" was me, but still it was crazy). As I watch all of these poor kids calmly walk by my house on their way to school I realize I am totally out of my element.
  • Everyone is posting facebook statuses about listening to Christmas music as a result of the snow. Confession: I've been listening to Christmas music since August.
  • I got pink eye last week. I don't know if I've ever had it before. I probably have, but not since I can remember so yeah.
  • Speaking of nuisances, the hamster has been missing for 6 days now. This is escape #6 in 3 months. We weren't sure if she was still alive until Joseph made the mistake of leaving her jar of food on the floor... Next day it was empty. That was like 3 weeks worth of food. Suspicions tell us she is somewhere in the utility room, probably cuddling up next to the water heater.
And now, for pictures:

Apparently it is super-uncool to actually like the llamas, so my kids just complain that the llamas will probably kick or spit on them.
Come on, just look at this face:
This is not the face of a jerk llama (although in their defense one of the llamas flatulated in a kid's face) Regardless, I absolutely love llamas so too bad kids, we're staying.

Here is my pink eye:

According to google, to catch a hamster:
Sprinkle flour across your doorways to find out where your hamster is coming/going--it will leave tracks in the flour (After 3 days of us stepping in flour we decided she is probably not in the kitchen area)

Tie a piece of string/floss to some hamster food, your hamster will take the food to her stash and you can follow the string (she just cut the floss and took the food)
When we came outside to take Joseph to school this morning there was a li'l snow on our car.

By the time I dropped him off and got back home it was going crazy

So I sat on the couch, cranked up the heater, and enjoyed the show outside my window.

Friday, October 19, 2012

I love this guy

He is turning 26 today. I cannot imagine what life would be like without him. Heck, I can't even remember what life was like without him!

7 Random facts about Joseph:

-His favorite color is green.
-He cannot function on less than 8 hours of sleep. He practically turns narcoleptic with anything less.
-His favorite movie is "mindless action and explosions." Essentially, his favorite movie is a genre.
-His best attribute is being very considerate. At the laundromat he cleans the lint out of the dryer AFTER he uses it so the next person doesn't have to.
-His favorite hobby is to know, do, and be good at everything. He is super-passionate about life. Sometimes I try to burst his bubble and tell him he can't do well in law school AND train for the 2016 summer Olympics but, hey, I have eaten my words on more than one occasion. Nothing is beyond Joseph.
-His greatest talent is optimism. When he was 9 and got his fingers chopped off he referred to the experience as a highly effective wart-remover. When someone is driving like a maniac and tailgating him he says "they probably just have to really really go to the bathroom."
-His other greatest talent is choosing to be happy. I know you shouldn't use the words "always" and "never" when describing a person but after living with him for almost 2 1/2 years I have never seen him angry. This is an incredible (and much appreciated) feat considering the dynamic mental/emotional tornado that is, well, me.

I feel very blessed to have this amazing guy in my life.

And now... we are off to Park City for the weekend to celebrate!

Thursday, October 4, 2012


Sooo the other night Joseph and I witnessed a couple getting engaged on our front lawn:

Apparently it was the same location of their first kiss. (I hated to ruin their special moment but I really felt compelled to go out there and ask what the heck was going on)

Sunday, September 23, 2012

This week in pictures

I started my job last Monday. I am supervising juveniles who have been court-ordered to complete community service. I find projects for them to do within the community (like pick up trash or paint over graffiti) and then make sure they do a quality job to earn their hours. On Thurs/Fri of this week I went to a training for all new state employees. They gave us temporary tattoos, ironically, right after giving us the talk about "professionalism in the workplace" which includes no visible tattoos.

Also to obtain this new job I had to have a Utah drivers license.

Yessssss. Say goodbye to the mugshot. Although, to be fair, it has served me well in being a great conversation piece and I still keep it in my wallet for good times.

We are finally starting to get settled in here. It's funny that by moving to Provo we have been visited by family almost as much in these last 2 months as we did in the 2 years we lived in Tucson. This weekend my sister Chanda had business in Salt Lake, so we met up at Ikea in Draper for a little shopping/bonding. I scored the deal of a lifetime:

I have been wanting this chaise lounge for ohhhh about 3 years. I found it in the "as is" section for only $10 because it was missing the cover. Pretty sure they forgot a zero on the price, but I went and asked one of the employees and they said "yeah I guess it is 10 bucks, pretty good deal." I was actually going to pass it up because Joseph has taught me well "don't buy things you don't need simply because they are a good deal... that's how hoarders are made." But Chanda reminded me that it was worth more than $10 in firewood alone so I should do it. This is why sisters are good to have around!

So here it sits in our living room while I figure out what to do with it... and I am now one step closer to being featured on Hoarders.

Last but not least, tonight I invented the most incredible dessert ever. It has only 2 ingredients and the prep time is about 4 seconds:

A spoonful of Nutella topped with whip cream.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Double whammy

I know it's a little early since Halloween is still 6 weeks away... but I have something TRULY frightening to show you.

I am a mutant. LOOK AT THAT THING! (And in case you're wondering, yes, I did have to go to a job interview with it looking like that--I put a hot pack on it to get the swelling to go down and it worked... a little). Ok try not to be totally disgusted but the cause of that... horrible horrible thing... is the faint dark spot to the upper-right of my mouth. Yes, a zit. I have no idea what exactly happened, but it swelled so huge that the residual swelling went into my lip. I am happy to report, as I write this, that my lip has returned to normal size, however the zit rages on.

People wondered why I was doing accutane a few months ago... well, there you go. Cystic acne is the worrrst. Agh. Oh well, having one of these every so often is not as bad as it was pre-accutane where I had, at any given time at least one big one but more often 2 or 3.

So the double whammy here was having a huge mutant lip AND have to go out in public and beg for a job. Continuing the theme of this post, here is the next double whammy:

Jury duty summons. Within 3 weeks of each other. For two different counties in Arizona. I was irritated at the Maricopa County one because this is the third time they have tried to send me a jury summons in the 6 years that I have NOT lived there. Not to mention the fact that this latest one was sent to my grandma's house, which has never been my address for anything.

The Pima county one was a surprise because I thought after "serving" as a grand jury alternate I was supposed to be off the hook for 3 years. And then I did the math... September 2009 to... oh. Wow, they are really on top of things! Don't get me wrong, I love jury duty. I just don't want to have to travel 12-14 hours to do it :)

Last double whammy: I got a calling in our new ward as an RS Pianist. Magically, I also got a calling in our old ward as a nursery leader. My friend texted me to let me know that I was sustained in sacrament meeting and everything. News to me!

Doppelgangers. Somewhere, someone is living my life in Maricopa county, sans mega-zit and double church-duty. Here's to less complicated times:

South Beach, Miami, Florida April 2012 after our anniversary cruise to the Bahamas.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012


I got a job. FINALLY. Truth be told, I have really enjoyed this time of being a stay-at-home wife, probably because deep down I have a really lazy soul. 6 weeks of it and I'm still finding stuff to keep myself entertained (stuff which doesn't even involve the internet, or pinterest--whose addictive reputation still scares me from even checking it out). The main problem with being a SAHW, aside from lack of financial contributions to our household, is the shame when meeting new people: "So are you in school?" "No. I finished." "So do you work?" "No." "Have kids?" "No." Awkward silence. Well, not so any longer! Now I can tell them about being Provo's newest deputy probation officer. Yeeeah boi. But seriously, I'm stoked. I start on Monday.

Joseph has been plugging away at his lawr school studies. Here's a picture of him from orientation week:
What a handsome guy :)
So far I like living in Provo. It's like a Where's Waldo hunt for past acquaintances from old wards, high school, college, seminary, and EFY. Also as soon as September came BAM leaves started turning red/orange and the weather became cool. Witnessing the changes that happen with Fall is like suddenly seeing a leprechaun... I've read about them and seen them portrayed in movies but wait, you mean to tell me they actually exist?? I am stoked. (Not to mention we were watching the U of A football game 2 weekends ago and at 10pm in Tucson it was 97 degrees--ha!)
Whenever I rave about the weather here people always say "just wait until Februrary..." which makes me want to punch them in the face. Don't ruin this for me people!
However, on that note, I will report back once I have found out how cold 20 degrees and 3 months without sun feels...

Monday, August 6, 2012

Recent Google Searches

In no particular order...
  • Good running trails in Provo
  • How to take care of wood flooring
  • Target Provo, UT
  • Why is there no Target in Provo? (Google has no good answer to this)
  • How to find an escaped hamster in your house
  • I sent in an application, should I call about scheduling an interview? (FYI: No.)
  • How long does it take to get used to higher altitude when running?
  • How to properly mount a closet rod (let's just say a devastating event occurred the moment I hung up the **last** shirt after unpacking)
  • Where is the nearest Taco Bell/grocery store/gas station/DI/Redbox/etc. to me?
In other news, after 2 Sundays in our new ward they realigned the boundaries and put us in a different ward. I thought it was bad I had to pass two churches on the way to our building. On the way to our new ward we pass five, including our previous building. Heyyy Utah.

And now, here is a pic of Joseph capturing the escape-artist currently known as Muscle-Truck:
(Muscle-Truck is our hamster, I don't think I've introduced her on the blog. She was Joseph's valentine's day present. More recently she has just been a nuisance)

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Adios & Hello

Goodbye Bobo's:

Adios Tucson:
 Hello 16 hour drive with this view:
 (Joseph drove the Uhaul, I followed in the PT Cruiser... and don't worry, this pic was taken while we were stopped for some construction)

Hello Provo. (& hello double-rainbow... this is the view from our front porch)

Friday, July 6, 2012

We are rich and famous now.

Back in October my friend Kami decided to get a group of people together to audition to sing the national anthem at a Diamondbacks game. This group happened to include Joseph, partially because of his excellent singing skills but mostly because of his muscles. They formed a double-quartet (I don't know the real name for it but it was a quartet X 2 = 8 people), practiced a lot, and went to the auditions in March. Last night they got to sing the national anthem at the game.

They let the whole entourage (8 people + all of their friends and family) onto the field while the players were warming up so the quartet X 2 could do a sound check. Sadly, I haven't known the Dbacks lineup since they won the World Series in 2001 (Gonzo is retired? Since when??) so I had no idea who any of the players were. But the true Dbacks fans in the group assured me that these guys are, in fact, famous.

After the sound check (they ran through the whole song) all of the players stopped warming up and cheered for them, probably because of Joseph's muscles. And because it sounded awesome.

The whole gang: Shannon, Emily, Kelsey, Kami, Chris, Dave, Joseph, & Joseph

And here is the actual performance:
(You may or may not be able to tell from the video, but there is about a 2 second delay from when they sing to when the sound actually comes out on the loud speakers. Also they could not hear themselves because the sound system was so loud. Despite the distractions they still sounded amazing, amiright?)

Afterward we loaded up on junk food and enjoyed the game. And even though we lost to the Dodgers 4-1 we still had a blast. Not to mention, later in the evening, my excellent dance skills landed us on the Jumbo-tron. Yeee boi!

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Secret obsession

After a long day/week/whenever-I-feel-like-it I throw on some PJs and skip to the best part of Lord of the Rings. I've seen the LOTR movies a couple dozen times, but the best part I've watched... ahem many, many times more than that.
And now, may I present...
[spoiler alert!]

Ahhhhh it kills me every time. (And don't ask me why my favorite part is when it seems like evil has completely triumphed... I have no idea. It just is.)

PS: totally unrelated but I had the strangest dream last night where I had to punch all these kittens that were following me. Really weird, but much more interesting than my usual dreams about going to work or getting groceries.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Memorial Day

[I will post about our trip to the Bahamas soooon, but I wanted to get these pics off my camera first]

We made a trek to Utah over memorial day weekend. Up through Vegas, down through Page.

This was my first time over the Hoover Dam on "the bridge". I remember seeing the preparations for it over 15 years ago! So I happen to have an extreme fear of heights on man-made objects. I fully believe that the only reason I made it across alive is because I did not know beforehand the size of this bridge. It is ENORMOUS. Pics do not do it justice in my opinion but, as you can see, I still tried. After crossing the bridge we went back and drove over the dam, just for old time's sake. We made that drive between Kingman & Las Vegas SO many times growing up but this was my first time as an adult. Everything just looks smaller! Except for the bridge. That thing is huge.

It was 105 degrees when we left Tucson and 68 degrees when we got to Salt Lake City--glorious!

The best perks were seeing 3-days-old Isaiah Matthew (why didn't I get any pics??? He is a cutie!) and visiting Samuel & Janae and Paul & Stephanie. OH! aaaand I met President Monson. Shook his hand. Totally awesome.

It was (sadly) a quick visit, the main purpose of which was to take care of the business of scoping out some housing, but we will be spending more time with them in the fall since... wait for it... we are moving to Provo-town. Bada-boom!

Joseph got in to BYU for law school. I'm so proud of him, he is such a hard-worker! As someone who actually enjoys hard work, I think he will have a very pleasant next 3 years...

I will be (hopefully) working if I can find a job that doesn't want to pay me 30% less than what I make now doing the exact same thing--c'mon Utah!

This will be home for the next period of our lives:
Well, particularly the bottom-left section since it is a 4-plex. But, you know what I mean. Built in 1908, lots of character. I am excited: 30% because it's way cute, 70% because there is a washer & dryer.

On the way back from Utah we stopped to visit friends and family in Winslow, Flagstaff, Cottonwood, Phoenix [we filmed an embarrassingly awesome music video for Call Me Maybe w/Allison], and finally Tucson.

So that's the latest with us. After 6 good years I will say bye bye to Tucson. Hopefully it's just hasta luego and not adiĆ³s. I will be so sad but happy at the same time. I love making new friends, I just wish I didn't have to leave my old ones.

PS: To all my SLC/Provo peeps... 6 more weeks my friends. And then, we party :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Happy Anniversary

Yesterday we celebrated 2 happy years of marriage! We had dinner at Lodge on the Desert... as I write this post 14 hours later I am still full. It was so tasty.

This is a picture of the chocolate tort I had for dessert. It was so rich I couldn't even finish it.

So, we all know I was a less-than-stable girlfriend to Joseph and got cold feet A LOT while we were dating but I knew I would be okay marrying him if I just didn't over-think it. I likened my experience with getting married to cliff jumping. Instead of standing at the edge looking down at the water and wondering if it will be deep enough I'm glad I just started (metaphorically) running until I ran out of ground and was past the point of no return because marrying Joseph was the best decision I ever made. I am so glad I didn't mess that one up.

I should note: getting married is like cliff jumping but marriage itself is much better--particularly the lack of terrifying free-falls and wedgies.

PS: I went running at like 4:30 this morning so I am really tired.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Cinco de Mayonnaise

Happy belated Cinco de Mayo:
Tonight we are enjoying homemade Sonoran Hot Dogs. Allow me to share the recipe: a li'l mayo on the bun, a li'l mustard on the top, a spoonful of pico de gallo, and a hot dog wrapped in bacon. [additional spoon full of pinto beans optional] Mucho tasty!

Monday, April 23, 2012

Good morning Arizona!

Check out this cute li'l baby diamondback we found this morning all snuggled up snoozing in the middle of our running path. Such an unassuming itty bitty camouflaged pile-o-poop-looking thing. Aside from the fact that it can strike at a distance 2-3X its body length with that pesky, tissue-dissolving, heart failure-inducing venom.

It was REALLY hard to see on the asphalt so we gently rolled rocks as close as we could--trying not to disturb the snake--to mark where it was so others would see it. This was the closest I have ever come to finding a real-life application for the game Shuffleboard.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Happy Easter!

May 2009 visit to "Jackrabbit"

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Things I should have bought at Goodwill but didn't

Le sigh. Most of these camera phone pics were sent to Joseph with the caption "I can haz?" or to Allison with the caption "I found your Christmas present". See if you can figure out which category each item belonged in.
Note: the main barrier to my obtaining these items was the price. C'mon Goodwill, you got these for free!

HUGE Painting of AZ desert: $60

Green Velvet Chaise: $120
Ok, technically this was a craigslist ad, but it still falls into my regrets category

Skanky Menorah: $25

Yellow velvet chair: $30

Life-size (4 ft+) creepy clown doll: $12

I'm not even scared of clowns & I'm creeped out. Let's get a close-up of that face:

A Pancreas mug: $4 [literally, I read the underside, it's a pancreas]

Large Beethoven bust: $30

Naked Adam & Eve as children musical ceramic book thing: $10

Ok, not an actual item but this goodwill shopper was easily in her 50s and had HOT pink hair

El Conquistador bronze statue: $13

Red velvet tufted couch: $25 (Can you tell I have a thing for tufted velvet furniture??)

Next I might do a post about "Things I bought at Goodwill but probably shouldn't have" and it may or may not include this child-size Barney garment bag I found for $4:

(But hey, it's perfect for my skirts!)